The Subtle Art of Listening

Listening as a dialect refers to the comprehensive understanding of verbal and nonverbal messages. While performing the act of listening, a person not only takes the plot under the wing but also caters to the way it is being told. An individual with effective listening skills stands out in the crowd. Well-built interpersonal relationships play a vital role in the life of an individual. However, effective listening lets you be a Master of It.

It is rightly said “The art of conversation is the art of hearing as well as of being heard,” William Hazlitt, Selected essays. People possessing super-excellent listening skills pave their own path to success. Listening with concentration and without making a judgment helps an individual pay more attention to the thoughts of the other person. Various premonitions that prove a person being a good listener are not so difficult to recognize. While lending your ears to someone, it is very important to not react abruptly or disagree on the stated facts. Rather, the speaker should be encouraged to frankly speak and express views in an open manner.

Interrupting the conversation inculcates distraction in the minds of both individuals. Empathy acts as an umbilical cord between the listener and the speaker. Being an empathetic listener, individuals can put forward countless ideas in order to have a meaningful conversation. Indeed, empathy lays the foundation of mutual trust between the two individuals. Showing active interest, while listening gives the speaker a chance to engage in a meaningful conversation. Maintaining great eye contact or nodding head can give an assurance to the speaker that his effort of speaking is not going down the drain.

“You learn when you listen. You earn when you listen – not just money but respect.” Harvey Mackay. The ability to be a great listener can help an individual make the grade and bring home the bacon. It is not as easy as it sounds. Professionally, listening holds fundamental importance. Not all can exhibit effective listening skills along with patience. However, an individual who masters the two skills respectively can call the shots. Persistence of a focused mind while listening can help an individual process the information aptly. A wavering mind or presuppositions can get a communication gap between the listener and the speaker.

Also, as a matter of fact, it is very important to be adaptive to pauses, which likely does not mean that the act of speaking is finished. It refers to sudden silence of minimal seconds in order to gather additional information in mind if required. The listener must be able to register important facts in mind stated by the speaker in order to keep the conversation substantial. “Half of the time you think you're thinking you’re actually listening.” Terence McKenna

Withstanding all the facts, we come across differentiating listening and hearing and in regard to that, there is a very thin line difference between both. Hearing evolves involuntary listening without an agenda. Whereas, listening refers to the act of perceiving thoughts and ideas of the speaker keeping the mind attentive and alert. An individual listens with concentration, but not necessarily hears with concentration. Active listening is the key element to successful networking.

The habit of being inquisitive shapes you to be a good listener. With the rising curiosity, the listener will remain alert in a conversation and would not have rambling thoughts in mind. There is another interesting fact that usually remains uncovered, “We listen to 125-250 words per minute, but think of 1000-3000 words per minute. “ Highgrain, Inc.

Talking on a daily basis, 70% to 80% of people are busy in some form of communication, while 55% of their time is unintentionally devoted to listening. It is very surprising to know that one can express only 7% through words, the rest of the communication is done in the form of facial expressions or various gestures. Only an effective listener can learn the art of nonverbal communication.

In case of doubt, effective listener questions in a very delicate manner to refrain from oddity and help the speaker retain a focused thought process. The questions asked should majorly be open-ended so that the flow of speaking does not take a twist and turn or leads to a narrower agenda. “Listen and you will learn, remain silent and you will be safe.” Imam Ali.

The act of remaining silent while listening helps you be in an exquisite frame of mind. It is advised to communicate through bodily gestures or facial expressions without uttering a word in order to keep the speaker focused. Most people remember 17% to 25% of the talk they listen to and the rest of the effort wanes down. It is very important to have a knockout on the undesired information and process the mind more quickly. 

In consequence of the facts stated above, one can be an effective listener by making the speaker feel comfortable through facial expressions, maintaining consistent eye contact, and being responsive in the conversation. In case, the deliverance of dialogue is irksome and the speaker exhibits worn-out thoughts and ideas, the listener must fruitfully listen and be dutiful rather than cut the conversation and escape.

Reference Links

1.Momentum Ministry Partners. (2019). Feeding A Pastor’s Soul-Pastorpedia. [online] Available at: https://buildmomentum.org/feeding-your-soul-it-is-not-as-easy-as-it-sounds-pastorpedia.

2.Inc42 Media. (2020). How Wooden Street Carved Out Positive Unit Economics By Tapping Custom Furniture Demand. [online] Available at: https://inc42.com/startups/how-wooden-street-turned-ebitda-positive-with-custom-furniture-focus.

3.www.goodreads.com. (n.d.). A quote from Selected Essays, 1778-1830. [online] Available at: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/137005-the-art-of-conversation-is-the-art-of-hearing-as

4.‌www.goodreads.com. (n.d.). A quote by Terence McKenna. [online] Available at: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/518786-half-the-time-you-think-your-thinking-you-re-actually-listening .